I forgot to tell you that I will also post a lot about metro. Metro woes. I have a love/hate relationship with metro that leans heavily toward the hate side. I swear if my employer didn't pay for it I would commute with my bike. Lord knows I'd get to work faster--sweatier--but faster. Let's take yesterday afternoon for example of why I hate metro. Train rolls up and it's packed. Typical, it's the orange crush of terror (orange line). I squeeze my way on and try to get comfortable for my 10-20 minute ride. Why such a range in times, you ask? Well because it could be smooth sailing, err tracking, or we could stop in a tunnel, hold at a station, offload at a station, spend five minutes trying to close the doors, have a passenger shoe on the track preventing us from moving forward, or someone could even choose to end their life by jumping in front of the train. These are real life stories people!! Tales of the metro.
And I digress. Back to yesterday. This dumb biaaaa finds it necessary to lean on one of the vertical poles. This is very problematic for other riders because we need to hold that pole! After all, you never know if the train conductor today is texting, drunk, asleep, or all of the above. Sometimes that train comes to a screeching halt for no reason and I need a pole so I don't go flying down the aisle. The train gets more crowded and she continues to lean. (Lean backkkk, remember that rap song?!) I could hold the pole and have her sweaty shirt/back touch my hand or hold it higher and her hair would be touching my hand. Neither are acceptable so I take my life into my hands and hope for the best.
And I digress. Back to yesterday. This dumb biaaaa finds it necessary to lean on one of the vertical poles. This is very problematic for other riders because we need to hold that pole! After all, you never know if the train conductor today is texting, drunk, asleep, or all of the above. Sometimes that train comes to a screeching halt for no reason and I need a pole so I don't go flying down the aisle. The train gets more crowded and she continues to lean. (Lean backkkk, remember that rap song?!) I could hold the pole and have her sweaty shirt/back touch my hand or hold it higher and her hair would be touching my hand. Neither are acceptable so I take my life into my hands and hope for the best.
Source: Unsuck DC Metro
Issue number two: Old man will not stop staring at me. CREEPY. And I mean old, like a grandpa. He wasn't even trying to hide it and I was throwing up in my mouth a little.
Issue number three: GETTING OFF THE TRAIN. OH MY GOD PEOPLE. When 3897642624 people are on the train and 237674 are trying to get off you MUST, I REPEAT MUST, step off the mothereffing train so that we can get off. But noooo, you people try to shift, move, duck, stand instead of just stepping off the train. This leads me to yell, "STEP OFF THE TRAIN PEOPLE, YOU WILL BE ABLE TO GET BACK ON." I know you have to ride the train out to your awesome home in the awesome suburbia that is Fairfax County and get home to little Jack and Jill, but believe it or not it's just easier and you will still get there if you step off the train. It will be a lot smoother for everyone else, especially me, and that's what is most important, right?
There are a lot more issues, but that's for another day. This is all happened in one commute so I think that's all I will talk about for today. BTW, I almost took a picture of the dumb b leaning on the pole so I could post it here for you people. I didn't. I majorly regret this decision.
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