2011

Well, I'd be remiss if I didn't blog to reflect on my life in 2011. When I think back to 2011, I truly think of it as the BEST and WORST year of my life. I know that sounds cliché, but it is really the only way to describe 2011 for me. Basically, the bad started at the end of 2010, and continued well into 2011, getting worse in January. I was extremely unhappy with my career, which made me unhappy in life. I just felt lost in life. Was this how I was supposed to feel at 26? Was this it? Could I do this for the next 30 plus years? Even if I found another job, could I leave this one? It was prestigious, paid relatively well, secure, and to be honest a lot of people would kill for that job. My motivation was gone. I had the best work ethic in high school in college. By the time 2011 rolled around it was dead. I was just a shell of myself who came to work, didn't talk to anyone, miserable, barely left my desk, and then left to go home. I let that place suck so much energy out of me all I wanted to do when I got home was work out and retire to my room. I also pushed people away that had nothing to do with any of it, and I regret doing that.

In January I recognized how bad I had let things get and sought out change. From there I focused on how I could make the best of my job until I completed my service agreement. I could choose to be happy at work and suck it up, or I could let it swallow me. I'm stubborn, but slowly I realized the path of least resistance was choosing happiness. I used to think that was straight up bullshit. People would say, "You can choose to be happy." And I would think, "Whatever, how do you choose that if you hate everything around you?" Quite simply, you just do your best to ignore the negative and focus on the positives. I started coming around at work and even had a few thoughts of not quitting. Ha! I must have hit my head those days.

There were other things going on with me too, more personal. I didn't think I would ever deal with it or face it. I am not going to get into that here though because this is a very public forum and I don't believe in sharing ALL with the world! But it has to do with the following theme. I am somewhat of a people pleaser. Hell, I am a complete people pleaser. That might be hard for some to believe, but I really just want everyone to be happy. Unfortunately, up until 2011, I lived my life for others. Almost every decision I made involved me analyzing, "Will this make X happy?" or "What would Y think if I did this?" A noble goal (if I must say so myself, haha), but an unrealistic one. Fact is, you're NEVER going to please everyone. There will always be someone who doesn't agree with you. There will always be someone who doesn't like you for good reason, or not. You can ALWAYS find a way to make yourself happy.

I saw this quote and it resonated with me: "When someone says you've changed, that simply means you have stopping living their life." Have I changed? Yes, a hell of a lot. More than some of you people reading this know. But it's because I changed for myself. And I never knew I could be this happy. At 27, I am the happiest I have ever been in my life and that feels amazing. Is every day rainbows and butterflies? Of course not. In fact, yesterday I was kind of down, but you keep your head up and you keep moving forward. You have one life to live and you'll never get a moment back. So with 2011 being the best and worst, I am looking forward to only the BEST in 2012! (If the world doesn't end!) Sorry I had to.

Happy New Year!

Merry Christmas! (Observed)

So I'm a day late, kind of. Technically, Christmas is being observed today too since it fell on a Sunday. I know I was lucky enough to have off today. I hope everyone else was too. If you don't celebrate Christmas then just happy weekend to you. I had a GREAT Christmas and now I'm ready for the new year. I went out with one of my BFFs, Mike, Friday night, which was a lot of fun. On Saturday I visited Kara and the baby again. It's crazy how much the baby has changed in just over a month!

Then I spent the rest of Saturday, Sunday, and this morning at my parents. It was very nice and relaxing. We ate, lounged, watched some chick flicks, which my Dad loved and my uncle hated. I think spending the last 30+ years with chick flicks has ruined my Dad. HAHA! I also got a lot of great stuff... Michael Kohrs purse and wallet, framed photos from the wedding, shirt, sweater, mandoline, VT tumblers (yay!), bathroom accessories, VT apron, check, and cash because I am due for a phone upgrade. I am getting the iPhone 4s tomorrow and cannot wait! Apple, here I come. Sorry Apple haters.

And it's back to work tomorrow for four days before a three-day weekend!

Me and Mike out Friday night

Daryn and Me

Laney, so precious when she is behaving!

Virus

So early Sunday afternoon I got a virus, or I should say, my laptop got a virus. I will say it's like the third time it has gotten this virus in six months. And no, contrary to what everyone was tweeting at me, I was not watching porn. It wasn't a bad one. It just acts like you need to click here to enable, run this virus scan, blah blah, but that's actually the virus. The trouble is you can't open your virus or anti-malware software! So basically I had to spend all Sunday afternoon/evening fixing it. And then it happened again last night. WHAT.THE.HELL. So rude. This time I can tell you exactly what sites I was on... abc.com to watch Modern Family and The Google. Eff this Dell. I am getting a Macbook very soon. I was trying to wait until February, but I don't know if I can. First world problems, I'll tell ya.

Also went to Tysons Corner on Saturday to do a little Christmas shopping. Wow, I thought I was at a rock concert because the parking was so crazy. Inside it wasn't bad. The best part was getting almost $200 worth of stuff at The Limited (my kryptonite) for $73. Yay Christmas sales!

They also setup a website to help Officer Crouse's family. If you can spare even $5 I recommend you donate. Especially in the spirit of Christmas. If you're interested please go here. They have received almost $100k, which is so impressive! I cannot believe Christmas is next week. Where did this year go?!

Virginia Tech

Once a Hokie, Always a Hokie. I am sure this is not news to you, but I love Virginia Tech with ever fiber of my being. If it was a person I would lay my life down for it. Bad things happen everywhere, every day, and on other college campuses too. Unfortunately, Virginia Tech is under a microscope because of the horrific, unthinkable tragedy that happened there almost five years ago. I will NEVER ever forget that day; so many lost their lives way too soon. Whenever I get down, frustrated, or annoyed by something I try to think of those 32 that aren't here to live this life. I am, and I shouldn't take it for granted.

Today we lost a Virginia Tech police officer to another senseless act of violence. You can say Virginia Tech is cursed, that bad things happen there, but you're wrong. Blacksburg is where my heart is and it will always be there. I know all my Hokies understand. Those of you that took this as an opportunity to make jokes or talk badly about Virginia Tech, shame on you. On April 16, 2007 we received an outpouring of support and it was wonderful. Today there was a lot of support too, but also some hate and I ask why? Thirty-two innocent victims are murdered and people literally send their support (see below), but one is killed and it's somehow a joke? I feel sorry for you and the person that you are, or at least the person that you portray to the world. But mostly I feel sorry for you because you never got to go Virginia Tech and experience the magnificence that is Blacksburg! HOKIE NATION. WE ARE VIRGINIA TECH.

Rest in peace Officer Crouse and thank you for your service. UT PROSIM.

Fail Fail... WIN!

Two fails this weekend. The first one was Ram Racing's Hot Chocolate 15k/5k at the National Harbor Saturday morning. The race was set to start at 8am so my friend and I left my place in Arlington just before 6am. Everything was just dandy until we approached the location where we were going to park. Dead stop on the highway and we were still a couple miles away. We needed to park by 6:45am so we could catch the shuttle. Well, we got there right at 6:45am and all was fine because they obviously realized things were running behind as there were plenty of shuttles. We got to the race at 7am so we had an hour to kill. Good and fine since I don't like to be rushed for races. Even had time to take some photos!

So there I am ready to run and there's a view of the harbor, kind of. Well, there was MAJOR traffic getting into the venue and it was blocking part of the 5k course. Yeah, real men of genius designed that course! The announcer was the worst as he kept saying, "about five to ten minutes until we get this thing going." Umm, no. The 5k was supposed to start at 7:30am and it started at 8:30am. So the 15k, which I was running, started at 9am. AN HOUR LATE. I also didn't plan on standing in the cold for two hours so as you might imagine I got a little chilly in that outfit. This was only the beginning of the worst. My toes were numb for the first three miles of the course, a very strange feeling. The course was AWFUL! We ran the first 5 miles on a legit highway, interstate, whatever you want to call it. AND they left a lane open for traffic. I was dodging semis, mack trucks, douche in a BMW, breathing in exhaust fumes, and looking at signs for 495, 295, Route 1.

Hey guys, let's take this run onto 295! #safe

We finally got up to the harbor and that was okay, but the course was just still so dumb--narrow, off road, on road, sidewalk. Ridiculous. I am pretty sure my dead cat (RIP Miss Kitty) could have designed a better course. This was definitely not a course for a PR as you had to weave in and out to get around people because it was so crowded. I still finished in an hour and 20 minutes so not great, but not bad.

Then we have disaster number two: ACC championship and the Hokies. Holy hell what an awful showing. There's really nothing good to say about that effort! However, the joke was over the next day when we got the invite to the Sugar Bowl! Honestly, better bowl than the Orange Bowl anyway! Better location and better opponent. It's just so funny because of all the hate about it too. I swear some people just love to hate the Hokies. Sure there are teams out there I don't really care for, but I don't actively spout hate and hope they lose. Lots of people do that to the Hokies and to them I say SUCK......... OUR SUGAR! Haha. And today was all about how undeserving we are and this is a travesty. Hoooookay, what about Michigan?! And what about the fact that this is all about money anyway just like everything else in this greed riddled world!? I mean Bernie Madoff might as well be running the NCAA and BCS because it's all about getting the suits more money for their yachts, summer homes, luxury cars, and other non-necessities. So do we deserve to go to the Sugar Bowl? No, not really, but we're going so STFU and I'll be cheering them on with my hater blockers on. PEACE.